I had learned the value of writing things down when I was getting sober. There is something purposeful about writing with pen and paper, but I confining my purpose to staying off the salt & the sauce and remaining as close to "reality" as I possibly could. Dreams were still scary things to me. I included them in the realm of fantasy - somewhere I'd spent far too long.
For me, that meant that I kept a daily inventory - my plans for the day, a gratitude list, and some meditative thoughts. I also included a record of what I had done right for the day, goals I had accomplished and areas where I had gone awry with selfishness, anger, or fear. This inventory kept me grounded each day, but that was about as far as my writing went.
So back to dreams. Any good motivational speaker tells you to have dreams. Having tried dozens of self-help avenues, I was familiar with dreaming a dream. My problem - I see in hindsight - is that I never REALLY believed my dreams would come true. They weren't dreams, they were wishes.
I didn't know how to set goals, make and keep commitments, eliminate time-wasters, or prevent procrastination. So dreams were something I hoped someone or something else could give me - and I was always on the search for someone or something who could help me make my "dreams" come true. So learning to become dependent on me and God for the things I need in my life (otherwise known in recovery circles as "self-support), I kind of put dreams on the back shelf - in a locked box marked "DANGER, DO NOT OPEN."
Enter this pretty little book. It was so pretty, and the message so meaningful - "Make Every Day Count - it seemed like it deserved a special place in my life. So one day, I opened it.
It was so small, not a place to write anything lengthy. What do people use little books for? I referred to the cover again...."Make Every Day Count".....how does one do that? I hadn't the faintest idea.
So I just wrote something down I "wished" for. I felt a little scared. I only wrote one thing, then closed back the book. But I kept on, day after day. After all, what could a few words on a tiny piece of paper do?
Over time, I have written more and more things - I call them "brainsparks". I have gone back and reviewed what I wrote. I've seen my dreams change, and some dreams stay the same. More importantly, I saw patterns. Some things I think of once and they are gone - but some persist.
Do I want to go on a cruise? Sure. But if I never do, it will be ok. But over the course of many months, I have seen a persistent interest in real estate, architecture, and civic development. Looking back these been an interest of mine for decades. Are they passions? I would say so. So why do I not pursue them?
These questions might never come up if I didn't have dozens of pages with addresses written on them - houses or buildings that have inspired me. Properties I've thought "If I owned that I would...." Notations about community projects I think are needed. Philanthropic things I would do if I were wealthy. But I know today these things don't have to be fantasies, they are actually signposts pointing me to what my true self loves - and I can engage those things today...if I choose to.
So I've come to see the little book as meaningful. I am finding my inner fanciness. I keep it with me in my purse that only contains 2 pens, a checkbook, my wallet, phone, some dollar bills and a set of keys. When I get that spark of inspiration, the little book is there.
Check back tomorrow for "The Art of Thank You" where I will share about thanking the person who gave me the little book of Pocket Fancy and my ideas about what goes into a good Thank You note (or text).









